SHF News · Shit List

The kind of shit that you just HAPPENED to get while in a traffic jam.

The kind of shit that smells SOOO bad, you swear you swear you must have eaten a small dog the night before.

The kind of shit that smells exactly like an entire carton of rotten eggs.

The kind of shit that just pokes its head out, then quickly goes back in.

The kind of shit so stinky, it can take the paint off a ceiling.

The kind of shit that just hangs off your ass before it falls into the water.

The kind of shit where you have to go so bad, you'd pay $30,000 for just one toilet.

The kind of shit where you eat really spicy food and your asshole feels like the inside of your car cigarette lighter.

The kind of shit where you have to sit on the toilet so long, your legs go numb from the waist down.

The kind of shit that stinks up the bathroom so bad, you have to lie and say it was the guy before you who did it.

The kind of shit that no matter how many times you flush, it always floats back to the surface.

The kind of shit you have to squeeze out in 90 seconds or less during the commercials, so you don't miss any good boob shots.

The kind of shit that sits in the toilet overnight and mysteriously expands to twice its normal size.

The kind of shit that yanks out the hair of your ass as it pushes its way out.

The giant shit you take at a crowded party. And when you flush the toilet, you watch in absolute horror as the water starts to rise...

Shit List